Tips for Parents & Educators on Avoiding Regret
Thinking a Goal Through
While your teen considers what they will need to accomplish their goals, work to be a resource for them:
- Help them identify what skills they have, or need to develop, that will help them reach their goal.
- Remind them of the talents and strengths they already posses that will aid them.
- Help them set attainable goals by gently showing them any unrealistic assumptions they may have made.
- Share your knowledge with them and help them research information they will need.
- Give help when needed, but let them find help from outside sources, as well.
- Provide the resources they need, but allow them to find them on their own, if possible.
- Help them plan for obstacles and give them guidance when they hit unforeseen roadblocks.
- Suggest better ways to do things, if there are flaws in how your child is approaching their goal.
- Show them how to set a practical timeline for their desired goal.
Helping your teen to achieve their goal will be a source of pride for you, as well as your child. But be sure you are not doing the work for them. Goal setting is important for teens to develop their independence.
Obstacles
It’s important to help teens to see beyond the inevitable setbacks that come as a part of working toward their goal. While you can’t help them with every obstacle that comes their way, here are a few you should help them see beyond:
- Fear – Teach your teen that it’s alright to be worried about whether or not they can achieve their goal but that fear shouldn’t paralyze them into inaction. Encourage them when they seem unable to move ahead.
- Lack of commitment – Show your teen that it’s important to actively choose to do something. If they don’t commit to their goals, they won’t achieve goals that truly build their confidence and self-respect.
